fillers or aus i would love to play running list; if you're interested in any of this, throw up a starter and i am there
steve + peggy
Peggy and Steve's reunion when he returns to the past.
That dance scene. /sobs
Anything about their life afterward.
steve + tony
Conversations about Peggy or Howard, or anything else they'd talk about during their 2-man mission to the past
First time Steve and Tony interact after Tony calls Steve out on how failing together sucks.
Did Steve and Tony ever talk during those 5 years? If so, what did that look like?
[au] Tony survives, but Steve doesn't know that when he goes back in time. So now Steve is really old and Tony is not.
[au] Tony survives and Steve comes back from returning the stones and they rebuild their relationship
steve + natasha
Awful life at Avengers compound before Ant-Man, basically lots of hurt/comfort with each other
[au] When Steve tells Natasha that maybe they should both move on, he asks her out on a date — it becomes a very sad attempt at moving on, but it's also a sad kind of solace.
steve + bucky
Honestly, they barely got any time back together. Steve and Buck MUST have talked before Steve just decided to go back in the past. Possible convo where he admits he's not coming back, and asking Bucky if he wants to return back to their time with him?
steve + anyone
So ... you can so Mjolnir now?
Conversations with various characters when he returns the stones to their rightful place in the past
Someone insisting on going back in time with Steve, and they return all the stones together and this person convinces Steve to come back (or, is convinced that he really doesn't want to)
shuri + anyone
Rebuilding the world from Wakanda
Meeting the other avengers
One-uping our science bros during reconstruction :D
tony stark (AI) + morgan/anyone
I imagine this will be mostly sass.
And with everyone who is not Morgan, this will basically be him joking about how he's going to live forever.
[ He finds Steve still staring out over the water long after everyone else has gone inside to comfort Stark's widow and child. He knows how hard Steve took his death, even if they've never actually talked about it. It's the same with Natasha, though Sam at least managed to make some headway in that direction after he'd had time to process it himself. None of it is easy and Bucky doesn't know if he trusts himself enough to bring it up with him.
He steps up beside him, the leaves crunching under his feet as he buries his hands in the coat of his leather jacket and follows Steve's gaze. He may not know what to say, or how to say it, but he can damn well ensure that Steve doesn't have to go through this alone. ]
[ After the service, Steve hadn't meant to wander out here alone. He only knew he needed to walk, and then step by step, his feet took him here to the edge of the lake. If there had been more land, he probably would've kept going, but even Steve Rogers can't walk on water. Though, he thinks, Tony Stark kind of could.
He smiles softly at the thought, even as he feels a lump gathering in his throat. He could never have told Tony that flying lets him pass over water like Jesus. A comment like that would've gone straight to his head.
Would've.
When it comes to Tony Stark, Steve has too many regrets.
Before he can dig himself into a hole too deep, however, the crunch of the leaves though gives him plenty of warning that someone's coming. After a few steps, without looking, he knows it's Bucky.
In the first couple of seconds, he feels compelled to say something or to explain why he's here. But as he turns to look at his best friend, Steve just smiles, weakly, like a soldier who has always known what it means to lose a man — but who knows he will never be able to move on. ]
[ That smile hits Bucky right in the chest and he frees his right hand to reach out and put it on Steve's shoulder, squeezing it. ]
He was a good man.
[ He knows that. Despite the last time they saw each other. Despite the right he'd had to go after Bucky the way he had. He knows what he'd meant to Steve. To all of them.
[ The squeeze feels familiar — a mirror of the many times they've gone through this ritual for one another.
When he hears Buck say that Tony was a good man, Steve pulls his smile tighter as he nods. His own hand reaches up to pat Bucky's twice, before lowering back down. ]
A great one.
[ It's less of a correction and more of an acknowledgment — of both how much Tony had grown, and how much Tony had taught him in the past ten years. ]
There were rumours. Rumours that were hushed whispers. It was after SHIELD had been started. Howard had brought Peggy to California and helped found SHIELD with her. She basically ran the show and Howard was in charge of the tech, when he wasn't wooing the ladies. Still, as aloof as he appeared, he kept his eyes and ears open.
When there were whispers of Peggy dating again, long after the good Captain had died and never came home, Howard became worried. Some mystery man. Peggy never brought him to work, never talked about him. No pictures. No nothing. Still, she was smiling more. There was a skip in her step that had been sorely lacking.
Howard felt protective. He wasn't going to let his best pal get hurt. That's what caused him to show up at her house. The workday was over. He should have called first. He should have done a lot of things. Howard prepped for the inevitable brush off and perhaps slap of showing up unannounced. Peg and Jarvis were both very British when it came to that.
His fist banged on the door hard. "Peg, I know you're in there and I know you're not alone. I can hear the music. Open that door right now," he growled.
It's soft, dancing music — maybe swaying music is a better way to put it, probably from the radio. But when Howard's fist bangs on the door, even if the music is still playing, it feels like the rest of the houses freezes.
The sound of footsteps follows, but when the front door opens, it's only Peggy that's in view.
"What is this about Howard?" she asks, with a single hand on her hip.
In the background, the radio keeps playing from the other room.
"Don't give me that, Peg." Howard shook a finger at her. "You know that I care about you. And I respect your privacy, well, more than most. We've been through a lot and I keep a few secrets for you, but this..." He took a step closer, but did not try to force his way inside.
His voice lowered, just enough that he wasn't shouting, but that anyone in the house could hear him. "You are a good woman. You have a good heart and you are one of my best pal's, Peg. You start dating someone new and I'm not going to let it go amiss. Gotta make sure that they pass the Stark test. Be worthy of you." His arms crossed over his chest and his lips formed a little pout.
"Come on... I don't want to see you hurt again. I was there, after he went into the ice. You deserve better than that." Howard had tried. He'd tried so hard to find Steve, searching even when others told him not to. That's how he'd found the Tesseract. In his heart, not finding Steve had been his biggest failure.
There's a stern look on Peggy's face, one that's only curbed by the slight smirk on her lips. Howard had become one of her best friends. She just had no idea he'd come over to her house, demanding to see whoever it was she's dating.
"Howard."
But then he starts talking about how he doesn't want to see her hurt again, and Peggy just stands here, still holding onto the door, unsure of what to do next. Steve had asked her not to tell anyone, at least not yet, and—
"It's alright, Peg." The voice comes from somewhere behind the door. To Howard, it's so very, very familiar. "I don't mind being vetted." It's said with a warmth to his voice, like Steve knows he's about to reunite with a very old friend.
Peggy nods then, and without opening the door further, she steps aside and motions for Howard to come inside.
[ They arrive in New York in the middle of a Vietnam war protest. As far as arrivals go, it's not exactly the most discreet one, especially in their white suits. They look like astronauts in the middle of a group of angry students and young people. There's a gasp as some of the protestors fall back at their sudden appearance and Tony looks up to meet Steve's eyes.]
Let's get out of here.
[ He nods towards the right and begins moving through the crowd towards a street that isn't packed with protestors where they can regroup and figure out a way to get to New Jersey.]
[ There's no discussion needed. Steve nods immediately and follows Tony towards a side street. It's so crowded here that Steve doesn't even disable his helmet — it's too risky for him to be recognized.
After they make a few turns and find their way down an alley, Steve sets down the hammer, lifts his wrist and tells the suit to disappear. That's better. At least they're less wildly dressed. ]
One down, five to go.
[ They'd returned the reality stone first. They'd guessed that one would be easiest and they were exactly right. Peter Quill was still passed out outside the temple when they placed the stone back into its protective case. ]
[ Tony doesn't wait as long to disable his suit. His mug doesn't mean anything yet and the truth is, the anonymity is a welcome relief. Still, it takes some getting used to, not seeing the tech that he's taken for granted for so long around them. He wonders if this is how Steve had felt when he'd woken from the ice. A man out of time.
He stops, tapping the time gps on his wrist. ] The coordinates must be off. We're going to have to find a way to New Jersey.
[ The Avengers were not the only ones who'd suffered a thorough defeat.
Jane's galaxy had been beyond Thanos' reach, true, but in that far corner of the universe there instead was a warlord named Kylo Ren. Ren commanded a great army and an even greater, darker power, and he'd sought death and destruction, intending to build a new order from the ashes of his rage. She had fought against Ren, as did many others; they had called themselves the Resistance, a ragtag band of rebels under the leadership of one General Leia Organa. Jane's mother.
But Ren and his First Order had won. That Jane survived at all was a miracle in itself.
Her escape pod had crashed on Earth a few days after Thanos destroyed the Infinity Stones, his final act somehow causing a rift in space-time and allowing her to slip through. She'd been found and taken in by the surviving Avengers, at least those who'd opted to remain in the New York area, and she'd been as lost and devastated as they were, albeit for different reasons.
It had been several weeks since. She'd recovered from her physical injuries and acclimatized to the Terran homeworld, but the nightmares and the guilt persisted. She supposed it was harder for her to move on because she was an empath, and unlike Mantis who needed to be in physical contact to feel someone's emotions, with the Force Jane could sense emotions as acutely as one could smell something in the air. This world, this galaxy, was aching for those who'd vanished, and she had to deal with that, along with her own grief.
She stood alone on the Brooklyn Bridge that afternoon, hands tucked into the pockets of her jacket, watching the sunset. The view was beautiful, but she couldn't bring herself to think so. ]
[ In many ways, finding Jane had been a welcome distraction. In the few days between the snap and her crashing onto Earth, all anyone knew had been destroyed. Half the world had vanished. Half their team — gone. Then, in the days immediately after killing Thanos, the remaining Avengers had felt useless.
Helpless.
And for Steve, helping someone was his fallback, his own compartmentalization technique.
So they took Jane in, and it hadn't taken long for the truth to come out, at least about her galaxy being beyond Thanos' reach. They'd filled her in on what had happened in their galaxy and promised to help her find a way back home.
It was still unexpected, however, when Steve sees her standing by herself on the Brooklyn Bridge. He's running, which was more distraction than exercise at this point, but not running felt regressive. Like he was admitting that there was simply nothing left that he could do.
He's a little out of breath when he slows to a jog, then to a stop, first glancing out into the sunset before saying anything. From here, you can see the countless boats still out in the docks, motionless except for the waves that carried them up and down without their owners. ]
[ Her gaze is distant and she's fumbling distractedly with a ring when he comes to a stop beside her, and it's not until he calls out her name that she actually realizes she's no longer alone. Under normal circumstances she would've been able to sense him coming, but she's been trying not to access the Force so much, in the hopes that it would somehow help her feel less.
It's not really been working.
She turns her head to look at him, and though she attempts to come up with one of her smiles, she falters. ]
Hey, Steve.
[ But she wants to smile for him, because she feels he needs it more than anyone, most especially after everything he's done for her in the short span of time they've known each other. There's a sadness to him she can't quite place, one inexplicably deep and complex. He's so... lonely.
She tucks the ring back under her shirt, though the thin metal chain around her neck remains visible. ]
Question for you. [ Now there's at least a hint of a smile at the corners of her mouth. ] Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?
[ Were she back in her galaxy, with the people she called her family, they'd be groaning and rolling their eyes by now, because her jokes were terrible. But she kept throwing them around anyway, with an infectious grin and a twinkle of mischief in her eyes that nearly everyone in close proximity to her seemed to adore. None of which was present right now. ]
after the stones are returned, after tony survives
[ Although Happy (and Pepper, and Rhodey) keep insisting that he should keep resting, Tony’s starting to go a little stir crazy being home. He’s tired of laying down, of napping, of being cooped up. And he gets why they’re so protective and careful with him, really, he does. He knows the first days after the battle hadn’t been easy, that he had scared the hell out of all of them. He knows how close he came to death because there are some days where he still feels like death warmed over.
Today is a good day, though, and after some insisting he manages to convince Happy to drive him to where the compound used to be. He had turned over the keys to Fury for the reconstruction, and he assumes people are there working with whatever they have while they get the compound up and running again, but even if they aren’t he just...wants to be there. Maybe it’s morbid, maybe it’s pointless, but, well, the heart wants what it wants.
While Happy drives, Tony manages to sleep during most of the drive, but he wakes up in time for them to cross the gate. Most of the debris has been cleared, giving way for the craters from the blasts to become visible, but it’s not all gone. People are working, trying to get the place up and running, and it’s something. It makes him feel better just at the sight.
As they approach, the sight of a familiar face makes him pause. He hadn’t expected anyone from the team to actually be there, but Steve Rogers is off to the side, close to where some of the tents are, and for some reason it takes him by surprise.
“Pull over, Hap,” he says after a brief pause. Once they park, Happy is quick to walk over to his door to help him out of the car. Not that he can’t do it, exactly, but considering his right arm is more or less useless and in a sling that keeps it close to his body, he’s not stupid enough to deny the help. ]
Hey, Cap.
[ He looks a million times better than the last time they had seen each other; he’s standing on his own, for one, and doesn’t look as white as a ghost. The scarring on the right side of his face is nothing more than faint lines that show where the effect of the stones had almost carved him from the inside out, but it’s healed. He’s speaking, and other than his right arm being out of commission, he seems more or less okay. At least, okay enough to be here.
The corners of his lips quirk slightly in a small smile. ]
[ From Bruce, Sam and Bucky's perspective, Steve Rogers had gone back in time for only 30 seconds. Then, just like that, he was back, Mjolnir in one hand, an empty metal case in the other. He'd seemed normal — he was extra glad to see them, which made sense, but Steve also seemed pensive, like he'd experienced something he wasn't ready to share yet.
A couple days later, Steve eventually tells Bucky that he'd nearly stayed in the past, permanently. Bucky tells Steve he'd been surprised to see him come back. The two of them just smiled after that.
Now, a few weeks later, Cap is back at the compound to fulfill a promise. Before he left, Peggy made him agree to two things. First, that he'd always keep SHEILD — the organization she built — honest to its founding mission. Second, that he'd find himself a nice girl and settle down. The first was easy to agree to, the second, not as much. But he did agree, eventually. So he's here, rebuilding, because even if SHEILD no longer exists like it used to, the Avengers do.
The sound of a car door shutting pulls his attention though, as he turns around to see who it is. He sees Happy, walking over to open the passenger side door, and Steve expects to see Pepper more than he expected to see—
Steve smiles, with a sense of warmth and nostalgia in his eyes. He hasn't seen Tony since leaving to return the stones. ]
Tony.
[ And he does look a million times better. When Shuri had shepherded Tony to Wakanda for his initial treatment, Steve had only stayed long enough to make sure he'd be alright. ]
Recovery looks good on you.
[ He'd only visited once after he came back. Tony had been knocked out then, but Pepper and Rhodey had filled him in. Stable. Healing. Expected to make a nearly full recovery. That had been enough for Steve. ]
Thanks. Not bad, right? Came a long way from being fried extra crispy.
[ He says it with a smirk, as if he’s joking, but it’s not a lie. His arm is the only thing that shows the true extent of how the damage was initially, since no matter how many treatments he goes through they can’t seem to make it better, but at least it’s hidden under the sleeve of the henley that he’s wearing. ]
You look good, too. Taking some downtime while the compound is up and running, or are you back to the usual Cap duties?
[ The days that followed the fight against Thanos, Peter felt like his head was swimming and he couldn't quite figure out how to set it straight. He had been gone for five years. Five years in which the world seemed to have gone to hell and back. Five years where his dads thought that he had died, and--
And now, even if he's back, it's not like they can celebrate his return. He only got to see Tony alive for a minute in between the chaos before it had all gone downhill. He only got to hug him once before he had to watch as he snapped the world back in order, back to safety, and then he collapsed from the magnitude of the blast. After that, everything still feels like a nightmare. Having to watch him so badly burnt, unable to even talk or say goodbye as he and Steve tried their best to assure him that it was okay. That he could rest, that they'd be okay.
The pleas to beg him to stay still burn in his throat. The apologies for him having to do this, for having to die so that the rest of the galaxy could be freed from Thanos, they all still feel like they choke him at random moments but Peter can only hope that he's resting now, knowing that Thanos is gone.
The funeral, the memorials, Peter attends every single one and tries to hold it together as much as he can. He wants to be strong for Steve, and in a lot of ways, he just wants to uphold the promise that they had made to Tony. He doesn't feel anywhere remotely close to okay, but he has to try. Fake it til you make it, right?
What he doesn't count on is that he's there, everywhere he goes. Even after the memorials and the TV specials start to slow down, it's clear that the world isn't ready to let Iron Man go. Murals, makeshift altars, they all seem to pop up in the most unexpected places, and they find a way to knock the air right out of him every time. By the time they go to the lake house for a few days, Peter is almost thankful for the break. Maybe he shouldn't be - Spider-Man had taken a break for five years, after all - but he needs the quiet and the space from the city so he can finally feel like he can breathe.
After they get settled in, Peter more or less plops into bed for what's supposed to be a brief moment, but it turns into a nap that lasts for a few hours. He doesn't mean to, but apparently not sleeping well the last few weeks manage to catch up to him, even if it doesn't last very long. By the time he wakes up, it's dark outside and Peter considers just staying in bed for the rest of the night. Except, it's almost too quiet and...no. Staying put feels like it's just going to make him too restless, so he makes his way downstairs as quietly as he can. He knows the house well enough to know what floorboards will creak or groan against his weight, so he's careful not to step on any of them.
By the time he gets downstairs, though, he realizes that he didn't have to try so hard to be quiet. Steve is awake, and Peter smiles faintly. ]
[ In the aftermath, Steve often feels like the only reason he can stay standing at all is that he's trying to be strong for Peter.
Tony had made a choice. He'd lived his life to the fullest, undefeated, unwavering, and unrelenting in his pursuit of what he needed to do to keep his family safe. To keep the entire universe safe. And Steve understands, even if he both loves and hates him for it, that Tony had made a choice. At that moment, he saw an opportunity to exchange his life, for the world's and he took it.
That's what they got into this business to do, wasn't it?
And despite all the years they've had together — borrowed time, they'd use to call it — both Steve and Tony had known that every mission was a risk. They'd both nearly died before, multiple times each, and when it came to the endgame, well, they both knew that neither of them had a choice. There was nothing they wouldn't do to get their son back. Even if it meant one, or both of their lives.
Steve has always known too, that as much he and Peter love each other, Pete's always been closer with his Dad. He doesn't blame him for it, after all, he takes after Tony, and Steve's seen the two of them talk about science until the sun set and then rose again.
After that final battle and the funeral, Steve tries. He tries to set the Avengers up to not need him anymore, because without Tony, without Natasha, he tries but he can tell his heart isn't in it anymore. A long time ago, he gave his own life to save this world. Now, he's given it the love of his life, and Steve just can't give any more.
And as the murals and altars and memorials never seem to stop, he asks Peter how he feels about going to the lake house and just getting away from all of this for a few days. Not enough to miss too much of school, and Steve knows he's got that big trip coming up, but just a few days for the two of them. God is he thankful that Pete said yes.
The kid must be exhausted too because as soon as they get there, Steve goes to check on his room and he sees him completely knocked out on his bed. He just grins then, before closing the door and going downstairs to make dinner. He'll leave some for Peter, so he can heat it up when he wakes.
As the sun sets though and Steve sits down on their bed, he feels a wave of grief start to bubble up from the bottom of his chest, and soon he has a handful of the covers scrunched inside his fist and tears rolling down his cheeks.
Why did you have to go Tony? he whispers, to the room that they'd spent so much time in over the last five years. And god, maybe it was a mistake to come here, because everything — left so undisturbed — still smells like him. It takes all that Steve can do to not just lock himself inside Tony's closet and cry.
But time passes, as it always does, and when Steve finally acknowledges that trying to sleep in that room was clearly a scheme to torture himself, he goes back downstairs.
A few hours later, when Peter tries to sneak his way down the old staircase, Steve looks up from the sketch he's been working on beneath the yellow light of an old lamp. Seeing his son is one of the only things that still makes him smile immediately these days. ]
Not yet. [ He says, with a small sigh. They both know his Dad was the one who always had sleep issues. ] Though— I can't say the same for you. Feel a little better now?
[ Peter moves to sit on a couch nearby. While it's true that Peter and Tony got along all too well, mainly from their shared interests, Peter has grown more overprotective of his Pop than usual. He always has been - it's one of those things that happen when your parents are superheroes, and sometimes it's hard to tell if you'll get them back at all. But, with one of his dads now gone, it's as if he just wants to make sure that he's okay. That he won't be alone. That he can at least keep him company, even if it's the least he can do. ]
Yeah. Yeah, it... I didn't realize how tired I was, I guess. [ He smiles slightly. ] I'm good now, though.
You want something to drink? I can make you a tea or something.
[ according to the laws of quantum physics and time travel, returning the stones to the moment they were taken should reverse any potential errant time streams. it won't impact the past or change the future, but simply eliminate any alternative realities from taking hold in the multiverse.
however, vormir's not exactly a particularly logical place. it's a barren planet at the center of the celestial universe, not the library of congress. it does what it wants, really, and when steve rogers shows up out of the blue to return the soul stone, things really get weird. you see, no one's ever tried to return the stone. people have come back after obtaining it, of course, in the hopes of gaining more power or the secrets to mortality, but they've never gone back to vormir looking to speak with customer service to process a return without a receipt.
there's not even store credit. the red skull simply tells steve to place the stone on the rocky ground and go, and no matter how long steve lingers or queries or pounds his fist on the ground, nothing happens. he might as well just keep going. he might as well return all the stones, and then go back to the real world. nothing should change after that. the world should go back to exactly as it was before the stones were collected, save for all those people they brought back — and the dissolving of thanos, a real nice bonus feature.
it should. it should be totally normal. and yet, when steve heads back to the compound, there's a familiar crop of strawberry-blonde peeking over the top of a pair of widescreen monitors... and a voice, arguing, rising in volume with each repetition. ]
No, [ the voice repeats, ] I'm not dead. Yes, no, I'm aware that I was dead, but I'm obviously not dead anymore —
[ and then, a beat, as her eyes skim up to spot the man crossing the threshold. ]
I'm going to have to call you back.
[ hi honey, i'm home ]
you decided to play with me, so you get heartbreak
[ Those who know Steve's relationship with the Red Skull might guess that for him, it would be the worst possible part of returning of the soul stone. But it isn't, not by a long shot.
Steve's reunion with Johann Schmidt, however, is a complete surprise. Neither of them says much at the beginning, and instead, they just stare at each other until the Red Skull speaks first.
I never thought I'd see the day where Captain America comes searching for power. And yet, I have a feeling that you're here for something else.
Steve shows him the stone, the one the Red Skull had just watched Barton wake up with, clutched in his hands, and he can't help but look over to the ledge, even if there's nothing there.
This cannot be. No one, as they say, has ever come to return the stone. But Steve's already gotten his first clue that something is off, and he's known from the start there was something Clint had refused to tell him about his mission with Natasha to Vormir. So, with the suitcase, now closed, and Mjoinir in his hands, Steve walks over to the cliff. He never turns his back to Schmidt, but he looks down. He knows before he sees her body, that he's about to witness something truly terrible, and suddenly, Steve nearly chokes on the emotion in his throat.
Anger flows through him in a way that he didn't think would be possible after the snap had been reversed. But now, he knows that Tony hadn't been the only one to willingly give his life for the sake of the world. Natasha had done the same but to much less fanfare. She'd made her ultimate sacrifice in the shadows, on a planet inhabited by no one, appreciated by no one.
Bring her back. He demands, holding the stone towards Schmidt as if this could somehow reverse the sacrifice. But no, nothing. Schmidt says he cannot, that he has no power over this place, and that if Steve truly wishes to return the stone, he can leave it on the ground. No amount of anything results in anything more.
Soul, however, wasn't the last stone. Steve makes many more trips, some easy, some taking their own toll on him before he's finally back at the compound and sees Bucky and Sam and Bruce again. He smiles, even if it feels like he's now a different man than when he left. ]
Where's Clint? [ is the first question he asks, when he steps off the platform with an empty suitcase and Thor's hammer in tow. He can call him inside, they tell him, and sooner rather than later, Steve is entering the compound to do just that until—
I'm going to have to call you back.
He doesn't say anything. Instead, he walks around the television set, dropping the suitcase and Mjoinir — right, that part should be new news for her — to the ground. Then, he just stares at her, like he's trying to figure out whether this is in any way real, or even possible.
Then, finally: ]
He told me the stone didn't work that way. That sacrifices can't be unmade. [ Steve doesn't even know why he sounds so accusatory at that moment, like the Red Skull lying to him was somehow the most treacherous and important thing to talk about right now. ]
[ the universe works in mysterious ways. it's the sort of hokey, antiquated garbage stephen strange might parrot at her in the middle of an argument, as if the laws of the cosmic multiverse existed simply to thwart any attempts at logical action. but in this, natasha has realized, there is allowance for mystery.
she still doesn't entirely understand it herself. there had been a finality in death, a peace; it may have been a second or an hour or a millenia in between her own crash onto the stone floors of vormir and her awakening, but time had passed all the same. clint had taken the soul stone and gone back to the present, leaving her and her pym particles behind, and natasha had woken up alone.
the fact that she'd woken up at all had felt like a strange cross between a bad hangover and a dream. the red skull hadn't been any help — not that she'd particularly expected him to be, given his maddening refusal to give straight answers before — but even he had looked shell-shocked by her awakening.
probably just as shocked as natasha looks when steve drops off the hammer like it's a television remote, come to think of it. ]
That's what you want to talk about? [ not the fact that he's wielding mjolnir and a suitcase like he's the business casual dad version of thor? ] Where'd the hammer come from?
Months and months have bled together - and yet even in her emotional fugue if she were pressed Natasha could tell you exactly how long it'd been since the snap happened. Months of trying to track Thanos, months of trying to help scramble everything under control, to help those that remain. It's a whole hell of a lot easier said than done. There are many things that Natasha has done in the past that were easier to handle, and easier to manage to sleep after they were done. But in the months the Russian has still not quite managed to allow herself to really, truly get a good night's sleep since.
It's kind of hard to feel all right resting when you've failed the countless masses who are literally dust in the wind now.
There's no routine, no usual, and no normal even after the time that has passed no matter the hours that are left unfilled. No matter the fact that Thanos and any solution still elludes them. It's those things that haunt Nat in the night - whether through the nightmares or through her body tossing and turning, unable even subconsciously when she can shut down for a little while, until she's awake. Tonight it was the nightmares. And even though there's never rhym or reason to any of it - not even how she handles the insomnia - the Avenger found herself wandering the compound, peering into empty rooms ...though she's not sure whether it's torture or a punishment. The only door that didn't hurt to move passed was Steve's, and she's still fighting the impulse (as she breaks away toward the kitchen) to slip inside and reassure herself that he's still there. No matter how quiet she might be, though, she can't spin a justification to follow through that isn't at least somewhat creepy.
Others have been moving on, whether through force of will or necessity, but Natasha can't - she feels trapped in a way because she knows that this is where she needs to be should something change. There's a part of her that is yearning and itching for a chance, for something to cling to, though....for a balm, or a puprpose. It's in a numb state that Nat winds up seated on the counter with a bottle of water, listening to the silence. And she's not sure if it's hope or instinct that tickels the back of her neck. "Couldn't sleep either?"
The low town, and confidence there is false. She's not even entirely sure that he's actually awake...even if part of her might have selfishly hoped wandering passed his room would rouse him. She could just be talking to ghosts of the past, of the people that used to fill this space. She could be losing it, or maybe she already has.
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noble_sentiments) wrote2019-04-28 12:02 pm
Steve
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He steps up beside him, the leaves crunching under his feet as he buries his hands in the coat of his leather jacket and follows Steve's gaze. He may not know what to say, or how to say it, but he can damn well ensure that Steve doesn't have to go through this alone. ]
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He smiles softly at the thought, even as he feels a lump gathering in his throat. He could never have told Tony that flying lets him pass over water like Jesus. A comment like that would've gone straight to his head.
Would've.
When it comes to Tony Stark, Steve has too many regrets.
Before he can dig himself into a hole too deep, however, the crunch of the leaves though gives him plenty of warning that someone's coming. After a few steps, without looking, he knows it's Bucky.
In the first couple of seconds, he feels compelled to say something or to explain why he's here. But as he turns to look at his best friend, Steve just smiles, weakly, like a soldier who has always known what it means to lose a man — but who knows he will never be able to move on. ]
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He was a good man.
[ He knows that. Despite the last time they saw each other. Despite the right he'd had to go after Bucky the way he had. He knows what he'd meant to Steve. To all of them.
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When he hears Buck say that Tony was a good man, Steve pulls his smile tighter as he nods. His own hand reaches up to pat Bucky's twice, before lowering back down. ]
A great one.
[ It's less of a correction and more of an acknowledgment — of both how much Tony had grown, and how much Tony had taught him in the past ten years. ]
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post endgame
When there were whispers of Peggy dating again, long after the good Captain had died and never came home, Howard became worried. Some mystery man. Peggy never brought him to work, never talked about him. No pictures. No nothing. Still, she was smiling more. There was a skip in her step that had been sorely lacking.
Howard felt protective. He wasn't going to let his best pal get hurt. That's what caused him to show up at her house. The workday was over. He should have called first. He should have done a lot of things. Howard prepped for the inevitable brush off and perhaps slap of showing up unannounced. Peg and Jarvis were both very British when it came to that.
His fist banged on the door hard. "Peg, I know you're in there and I know you're not alone. I can hear the music. Open that door right now," he growled.
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The sound of footsteps follows, but when the front door opens, it's only Peggy that's in view.
"What is this about Howard?" she asks, with a single hand on her hip.
In the background, the radio keeps playing from the other room.
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His voice lowered, just enough that he wasn't shouting, but that anyone in the house could hear him. "You are a good woman. You have a good heart and you are one of my best pal's, Peg. You start dating someone new and I'm not going to let it go amiss. Gotta make sure that they pass the Stark test. Be worthy of you." His arms crossed over his chest and his lips formed a little pout.
"Come on... I don't want to see you hurt again. I was there, after he went into the ice. You deserve better than that." Howard had tried. He'd tried so hard to find Steve, searching even when others told him not to. That's how he'd found the Tesseract. In his heart, not finding Steve had been his biggest failure.
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"Howard."
But then he starts talking about how he doesn't want to see her hurt again, and Peggy just stands here, still holding onto the door, unsure of what to do next. Steve had asked her not to tell anyone, at least not yet, and—
"It's alright, Peg." The voice comes from somewhere behind the door. To Howard, it's so very, very familiar. "I don't mind being vetted." It's said with a warmth to his voice, like Steve knows he's about to reunite with a very old friend.
Peggy nods then, and without opening the door further, she steps aside and motions for Howard to come inside.
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1970s Mission Things
Let's get out of here.
[ He nods towards the right and begins moving through the crowd towards a street that isn't packed with protestors where they can regroup and figure out a way to get to New Jersey.]
ooooo!!!
After they make a few turns and find their way down an alley, Steve sets down the hammer, lifts his wrist and tells the suit to disappear. That's better. At least they're less wildly dressed. ]
One down, five to go.
[ They'd returned the reality stone first. They'd guessed that one would be easiest and they were exactly right. Peter Quill was still passed out outside the temple when they placed the stone back into its protective case. ]
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He stops, tapping the time gps on his wrist. ] The coordinates must be off. We're going to have to find a way to New Jersey.
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/slides in here - let me know if this doesn’t work? :3
Jane's galaxy had been beyond Thanos' reach, true, but in that far corner of the universe there instead was a warlord named Kylo Ren. Ren commanded a great army and an even greater, darker power, and he'd sought death and destruction, intending to build a new order from the ashes of his rage. She had fought against Ren, as did many others; they had called themselves the Resistance, a ragtag band of rebels under the leadership of one General Leia Organa. Jane's mother.
But Ren and his First Order had won. That Jane survived at all was a miracle in itself.
Her escape pod had crashed on Earth a few days after Thanos destroyed the Infinity Stones, his final act somehow causing a rift in space-time and allowing her to slip through. She'd been found and taken in by the surviving Avengers, at least those who'd opted to remain in the New York area, and she'd been as lost and devastated as they were, albeit for different reasons.
It had been several weeks since. She'd recovered from her physical injuries and acclimatized to the Terran homeworld, but the nightmares and the guilt persisted. She supposed it was harder for her to move on because she was an empath, and unlike Mantis who needed to be in physical contact to feel someone's emotions, with the Force Jane could sense emotions as acutely as one could smell something in the air. This world, this galaxy, was aching for those who'd vanished, and she had to deal with that, along with her own grief.
She stood alone on the Brooklyn Bridge that afternoon, hands tucked into the pockets of her jacket, watching the sunset. The view was beautiful, but she couldn't bring herself to think so. ]
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Helpless.
And for Steve, helping someone was his fallback, his own compartmentalization technique.
So they took Jane in, and it hadn't taken long for the truth to come out, at least about her galaxy being beyond Thanos' reach. They'd filled her in on what had happened in their galaxy and promised to help her find a way back home.
It was still unexpected, however, when Steve sees her standing by herself on the Brooklyn Bridge. He's running, which was more distraction than exercise at this point, but not running felt regressive. Like he was admitting that there was simply nothing left that he could do.
He's a little out of breath when he slows to a jog, then to a stop, first glancing out into the sunset before saying anything. From here, you can see the countless boats still out in the docks, motionless except for the waves that carried them up and down without their owners. ]
Jane?
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It's not really been working.
She turns her head to look at him, and though she attempts to come up with one of her smiles, she falters. ]
Hey, Steve.
[ But she wants to smile for him, because she feels he needs it more than anyone, most especially after everything he's done for her in the short span of time they've known each other. There's a sadness to him she can't quite place, one inexplicably deep and complex. He's so... lonely.
She tucks the ring back under her shirt, though the thin metal chain around her neck remains visible. ]
Question for you. [ Now there's at least a hint of a smile at the corners of her mouth. ] Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?
[ Were she back in her galaxy, with the people she called her family, they'd be groaning and rolling their eyes by now, because her jokes were terrible. But she kept throwing them around anyway, with an infectious grin and a twinkle of mischief in her eyes that nearly everyone in close proximity to her seemed to adore. None of which was present right now. ]
after the stones are returned, after tony survives
Today is a good day, though, and after some insisting he manages to convince Happy to drive him to where the compound used to be. He had turned over the keys to Fury for the reconstruction, and he assumes people are there working with whatever they have while they get the compound up and running again, but even if they aren’t he just...wants to be there. Maybe it’s morbid, maybe it’s pointless, but, well, the heart wants what it wants.
While Happy drives, Tony manages to sleep during most of the drive, but he wakes up in time for them to cross the gate. Most of the debris has been cleared, giving way for the craters from the blasts to become visible, but it’s not all gone. People are working, trying to get the place up and running, and it’s something. It makes him feel better just at the sight.
As they approach, the sight of a familiar face makes him pause. He hadn’t expected anyone from the team to actually be there, but Steve Rogers is off to the side, close to where some of the tents are, and for some reason it takes him by surprise.
“Pull over, Hap,” he says after a brief pause. Once they park, Happy is quick to walk over to his door to help him out of the car. Not that he can’t do it, exactly, but considering his right arm is more or less useless and in a sling that keeps it close to his body, he’s not stupid enough to deny the help. ]
Hey, Cap.
[ He looks a million times better than the last time they had seen each other; he’s standing on his own, for one, and doesn’t look as white as a ghost. The scarring on the right side of his face is nothing more than faint lines that show where the effect of the stones had almost carved him from the inside out, but it’s healed. He’s speaking, and other than his right arm being out of commission, he seems more or less okay. At least, okay enough to be here.
The corners of his lips quirk slightly in a small smile. ]
Good to see you.
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A couple days later, Steve eventually tells Bucky that he'd nearly stayed in the past, permanently. Bucky tells Steve he'd been surprised to see him come back. The two of them just smiled after that.
Now, a few weeks later, Cap is back at the compound to fulfill a promise. Before he left, Peggy made him agree to two things. First, that he'd always keep SHEILD — the organization she built — honest to its founding mission. Second, that he'd find himself a nice girl and settle down. The first was easy to agree to, the second, not as much. But he did agree, eventually. So he's here, rebuilding, because even if SHEILD no longer exists like it used to, the Avengers do.
The sound of a car door shutting pulls his attention though, as he turns around to see who it is. He sees Happy, walking over to open the passenger side door, and Steve expects to see Pepper more than he expected to see—
Steve smiles, with a sense of warmth and nostalgia in his eyes. He hasn't seen Tony since leaving to return the stones. ]
Tony.
[ And he does look a million times better. When Shuri had shepherded Tony to Wakanda for his initial treatment, Steve had only stayed long enough to make sure he'd be alright. ]
Recovery looks good on you.
[ He'd only visited once after he came back. Tony had been knocked out then, but Pepper and Rhodey had filled him in. Stable. Healing. Expected to make a nearly full recovery. That had been enough for Steve. ]
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[ He says it with a smirk, as if he’s joking, but it’s not a lie. His arm is the only thing that shows the true extent of how the damage was initially, since no matter how many treatments he goes through they can’t seem to make it better, but at least it’s hidden under the sleeve of the henley that he’s wearing. ]
You look good, too. Taking some downtime while the compound is up and running, or are you back to the usual Cap duties?
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you cheat with that icon, steve
you're icon isn't half bad tony
❤️
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happy to jump to a literal rebuilding montage over the course of the next 2 weeks
let me know if you want me to change anything!
love it, like always
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superfamily verse
And now, even if he's back, it's not like they can celebrate his return. He only got to see Tony alive for a minute in between the chaos before it had all gone downhill. He only got to hug him once before he had to watch as he snapped the world back in order, back to safety, and then he collapsed from the magnitude of the blast. After that, everything still feels like a nightmare. Having to watch him so badly burnt, unable to even talk or say goodbye as he and Steve tried their best to assure him that it was okay. That he could rest, that they'd be okay.
The pleas to beg him to stay still burn in his throat. The apologies for him having to do this, for having to die so that the rest of the galaxy could be freed from Thanos, they all still feel like they choke him at random moments but Peter can only hope that he's resting now, knowing that Thanos is gone.
The funeral, the memorials, Peter attends every single one and tries to hold it together as much as he can. He wants to be strong for Steve, and in a lot of ways, he just wants to uphold the promise that they had made to Tony. He doesn't feel anywhere remotely close to okay, but he has to try. Fake it til you make it, right?
What he doesn't count on is that he's there, everywhere he goes. Even after the memorials and the TV specials start to slow down, it's clear that the world isn't ready to let Iron Man go. Murals, makeshift altars, they all seem to pop up in the most unexpected places, and they find a way to knock the air right out of him every time. By the time they go to the lake house for a few days, Peter is almost thankful for the break. Maybe he shouldn't be - Spider-Man had taken a break for five years, after all - but he needs the quiet and the space from the city so he can finally feel like he can breathe.
After they get settled in, Peter more or less plops into bed for what's supposed to be a brief moment, but it turns into a nap that lasts for a few hours. He doesn't mean to, but apparently not sleeping well the last few weeks manage to catch up to him, even if it doesn't last very long. By the time he wakes up, it's dark outside and Peter considers just staying in bed for the rest of the night. Except, it's almost too quiet and...no. Staying put feels like it's just going to make him too restless, so he makes his way downstairs as quietly as he can. He knows the house well enough to know what floorboards will creak or groan against his weight, so he's careful not to step on any of them.
By the time he gets downstairs, though, he realizes that he didn't have to try so hard to be quiet. Steve is awake, and Peter smiles faintly. ]
Hey, Pop. Can't sleep?
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Tony had made a choice. He'd lived his life to the fullest, undefeated, unwavering, and unrelenting in his pursuit of what he needed to do to keep his family safe. To keep the entire universe safe. And Steve understands, even if he both loves and hates him for it, that Tony had made a choice. At that moment, he saw an opportunity to exchange his life, for the world's and he took it.
That's what they got into this business to do, wasn't it?
And despite all the years they've had together — borrowed time, they'd use to call it — both Steve and Tony had known that every mission was a risk. They'd both nearly died before, multiple times each, and when it came to the endgame, well, they both knew that neither of them had a choice. There was nothing they wouldn't do to get their son back. Even if it meant one, or both of their lives.
Steve has always known too, that as much he and Peter love each other, Pete's always been closer with his Dad. He doesn't blame him for it, after all, he takes after Tony, and Steve's seen the two of them talk about science until the sun set and then rose again.
After that final battle and the funeral, Steve tries. He tries to set the Avengers up to not need him anymore, because without Tony, without Natasha, he tries but he can tell his heart isn't in it anymore. A long time ago, he gave his own life to save this world. Now, he's given it the love of his life, and Steve just can't give any more.
And as the murals and altars and memorials never seem to stop, he asks Peter how he feels about going to the lake house and just getting away from all of this for a few days. Not enough to miss too much of school, and Steve knows he's got that big trip coming up, but just a few days for the two of them. God is he thankful that Pete said yes.
The kid must be exhausted too because as soon as they get there, Steve goes to check on his room and he sees him completely knocked out on his bed. He just grins then, before closing the door and going downstairs to make dinner. He'll leave some for Peter, so he can heat it up when he wakes.
As the sun sets though and Steve sits down on their bed, he feels a wave of grief start to bubble up from the bottom of his chest, and soon he has a handful of the covers scrunched inside his fist and tears rolling down his cheeks.
Why did you have to go Tony? he whispers, to the room that they'd spent so much time in over the last five years. And god, maybe it was a mistake to come here, because everything — left so undisturbed — still smells like him. It takes all that Steve can do to not just lock himself inside Tony's closet and cry.
But time passes, as it always does, and when Steve finally acknowledges that trying to sleep in that room was clearly a scheme to torture himself, he goes back downstairs.
A few hours later, when Peter tries to sneak his way down the old staircase, Steve looks up from the sketch he's been working on beneath the yellow light of an old lamp. Seeing his son is one of the only things that still makes him smile immediately these days. ]
Not yet. [ He says, with a small sigh. They both know his Dad was the one who always had sleep issues. ] Though— I can't say the same for you. Feel a little better now?
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Yeah. Yeah, it... I didn't realize how tired I was, I guess. [ He smiles slightly. ] I'm good now, though.
You want something to drink? I can make you a tea or something.
you asked for more nat, you get more nat.
however, vormir's not exactly a particularly logical place. it's a barren planet at the center of the celestial universe, not the library of congress. it does what it wants, really, and when steve rogers shows up out of the blue to return the soul stone, things really get weird. you see, no one's ever tried to return the stone. people have come back after obtaining it, of course, in the hopes of gaining more power or the secrets to mortality, but they've never gone back to vormir looking to speak with customer service to process a return without a receipt.
there's not even store credit. the red skull simply tells steve to place the stone on the rocky ground and go, and no matter how long steve lingers or queries or pounds his fist on the ground, nothing happens. he might as well just keep going. he might as well return all the stones, and then go back to the real world. nothing should change after that. the world should go back to exactly as it was before the stones were collected, save for all those people they brought back — and the dissolving of thanos, a real nice bonus feature.
it should. it should be totally normal. and yet, when steve heads back to the compound, there's a familiar crop of strawberry-blonde peeking over the top of a pair of widescreen monitors... and a voice, arguing, rising in volume with each repetition. ]
No, [ the voice repeats, ] I'm not dead. Yes, no, I'm aware that I was dead, but I'm obviously not dead anymore —
[ and then, a beat, as her eyes skim up to spot the man crossing the threshold. ]
I'm going to have to call you back.
[ hi honey, i'm home ]
you decided to play with me, so you get heartbreak
Steve's reunion with Johann Schmidt, however, is a complete surprise. Neither of them says much at the beginning, and instead, they just stare at each other until the Red Skull speaks first.
I never thought I'd see the day where Captain America comes searching for power. And yet, I have a feeling that you're here for something else.
Steve shows him the stone, the one the Red Skull had just watched Barton wake up with, clutched in his hands, and he can't help but look over to the ledge, even if there's nothing there.
This cannot be. No one, as they say, has ever come to return the stone. But Steve's already gotten his first clue that something is off, and he's known from the start there was something Clint had refused to tell him about his mission with Natasha to Vormir. So, with the suitcase, now closed, and Mjoinir in his hands, Steve walks over to the cliff. He never turns his back to Schmidt, but he looks down. He knows before he sees her body, that he's about to witness something truly terrible, and suddenly, Steve nearly chokes on the emotion in his throat.
Anger flows through him in a way that he didn't think would be possible after the snap had been reversed. But now, he knows that Tony hadn't been the only one to willingly give his life for the sake of the world. Natasha had done the same but to much less fanfare. She'd made her ultimate sacrifice in the shadows, on a planet inhabited by no one, appreciated by no one.
Bring her back. He demands, holding the stone towards Schmidt as if this could somehow reverse the sacrifice. But no, nothing. Schmidt says he cannot, that he has no power over this place, and that if Steve truly wishes to return the stone, he can leave it on the ground. No amount of anything results in anything more.
Soul, however, wasn't the last stone. Steve makes many more trips, some easy, some taking their own toll on him before he's finally back at the compound and sees Bucky and Sam and Bruce again. He smiles, even if it feels like he's now a different man than when he left. ]
Where's Clint? [ is the first question he asks, when he steps off the platform with an empty suitcase and Thor's hammer in tow. He can call him inside, they tell him, and sooner rather than later, Steve is entering the compound to do just that until—
I'm going to have to call you back.
He doesn't say anything. Instead, he walks around the television set, dropping the suitcase and Mjoinir — right, that part should be new news for her — to the ground. Then, he just stares at her, like he's trying to figure out whether this is in any way real, or even possible.
Then, finally: ]
He told me the stone didn't work that way. That sacrifices can't be unmade. [ Steve doesn't even know why he sounds so accusatory at that moment, like the Red Skull lying to him was somehow the most treacherous and important thing to talk about right now. ]
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she still doesn't entirely understand it herself. there had been a finality in death, a peace; it may have been a second or an hour or a millenia in between her own crash onto the stone floors of vormir and her awakening, but time had passed all the same. clint had taken the soul stone and gone back to the present, leaving her and her pym particles behind, and natasha had woken up alone.
the fact that she'd woken up at all had felt like a strange cross between a bad hangover and a dream. the red skull hadn't been any help — not that she'd particularly expected him to be, given his maddening refusal to give straight answers before — but even he had looked shell-shocked by her awakening.
probably just as shocked as natasha looks when steve drops off the hammer like it's a television remote, come to think of it. ]
That's what you want to talk about? [ not the fact that he's wielding mjolnir and a suitcase like he's the business casual dad version of thor? ] Where'd the hammer come from?
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Here! Have a little h/c and an opening to moving on together if you're feeling it! :)
It's kind of hard to feel all right resting when you've failed the countless masses who are literally dust in the wind now.
There's no routine, no usual, and no normal even after the time that has passed no matter the hours that are left unfilled. No matter the fact that Thanos and any solution still elludes them. It's those things that haunt Nat in the night - whether through the nightmares or through her body tossing and turning, unable even subconsciously when she can shut down for a little while, until she's awake. Tonight it was the nightmares. And even though there's never rhym or reason to any of it - not even how she handles the insomnia - the Avenger found herself wandering the compound, peering into empty rooms ...though she's not sure whether it's torture or a punishment. The only door that didn't hurt to move passed was Steve's, and she's still fighting the impulse (as she breaks away toward the kitchen) to slip inside and reassure herself that he's still there. No matter how quiet she might be, though, she can't spin a justification to follow through that isn't at least somewhat creepy.
Others have been moving on, whether through force of will or necessity, but Natasha can't - she feels trapped in a way because she knows that this is where she needs to be should something change. There's a part of her that is yearning and itching for a chance, for something to cling to, though....for a balm, or a puprpose. It's in a numb state that Nat winds up seated on the counter with a bottle of water, listening to the silence. And she's not sure if it's hope or instinct that tickels the back of her neck. "Couldn't sleep either?"
The low town, and confidence there is false. She's not even entirely sure that he's actually awake...even if part of her might have selfishly hoped wandering passed his room would rouse him. She could just be talking to ghosts of the past, of the people that used to fill this space. She could be losing it, or maybe she already has.